Say what you will, there is really only one way to divide the world into two types, and those types are The Pubber and The Clubber. I know, you're probably thinking "what about Karaoke Starz? Where do they fit in?" Belive it or not, The Karaoke Star is the umbrella under which both of the other categories fall. It's universal. Part of the collective unconscious. The archetype of all archetypes. Integral to the human experience. Whether or not you're aware, at some point during your life you either have embraced or will embrace your inner Karaoke Star. Don't hold back.

But I digress. The distinction at hand is: Pubber or Clubber? Please see the sets of lists below and decide for yourself.


Pubber

• A stockpile of of Bailey's, Jamison, Guinness
• A fridge-/range-full of Bangers & Mash
• A favorite sweatshirt or sporting jersey (preferably rugby/football)
• Some fudgesicles
• A bad haircut
• 20 gigs of classic rock, blues, motown
• A mental catalogue of all of Stevie Wonder's modulations

Clubber

• A stockpile of glowsticks
• A dry bar-full of Zima. Mmmmm.
• A favorite mesh top or torso
• Some mind-altering substances (on top of the Zima, naturally)
  
• 20 gigs of hard dubstep
• A knowledge of how many BPM's doth a good Beverly Knight groove make

Pubber

• Covered in bangers, mash, gravy, fudgesicle
• Sprawled on top of a broken chair
• Standing in a puddle of Coors Light
• Sitting in a puddle of Coors Light
• Changing pants in the shower
• Sharing a bar with woodland creatures
• Feeding tens of dollars into the jukebox

Clubber

• Covered in glowstick innards
• Sprawled on top of a Zima-filled bar
• Writhing in a mesh-and-torso-filled cage
• Quaffing vodka-based drinks with abandon
• Wearing Leather Pants

And I feel the distinctions are fairly clear. Please decide for yourself which one you are. Questions will be fielded in the Comments window.